Bon Appetit

Well nothing interesting has happened to me lately. Except that I went to make my sister's chili today even though she refuses to give me her recipe (Melissa seriously it's been over a year...I'll send you my address) so I went to the grocery store (that doesn't carry popcorn so I wouldn't label it as a grocery store) and went in search for some chili-like ingredients. Being the chef that I am (okay I'm at least better than Chelsea Farrall and her cottage cheese and ramen noodle mixture) I figured I didn't need a recipe so I just picked out some beans, corn, onions, peppers, spices, and tomato paste because I faintly remember a recipe on Pinterest involving that. Now time for the meat. Oh great I forgot I can't read Dutch. Let me whip out my iPhone and get on google translater. Ugh I remember I don't have wifi. These first world pains are really getting out of control. So I just pick a meat like substance hoping for the best. I go back to my apartment expecting to make this world-renowned chili because I'm afraid the people at the Gyros place are going to start asking me "You want the usual?" when I walk in. But who could blame me because their sandwiches are heavenly.

I'm trying to limit myself to 4 times a week. It's going to be a struggle. 

So I start cooking the meat (which actually turned out to be beef says Google translator!) and adding the onions and really patting myself on the back for how it's looking. Then I figured I was doing such a good job I would just kind of add everything in the pot because that's what my sister does. After I added the tomato paste things just were not looking good. I start to panic and go back on Pinterest to see what I did wrong.  

Ingredients:

• 3 cans (14 – 15 oz each) black beans
• 1 can (14.5 oz) diced tomatoes
• 1 diced chipotle chili pepper (canned in adobo sauce) or a pinch of ground chipotle chile powder
• 1 – 2 tbsp olive oil
• 1 lb very lean ground beef (less than 10% fat)
• 1 medium red onion, very finely diced
• 1 tbsp regular chili powder
• 1 1/2 tbsp ancho chile powder
• Pinch ground chipotle chile powder
• 2 1/2 tsp ground cumin
• 2 cups beef stock or 1 (15 oz) can beef broth
• 2 tbsp tomato paste
• Juice of 1/2 lime
• 1/4 cup cilantro, chopped
• Kosher salt and fresh ground black pepper, to taste

Besides me missing a "few" ingredients I quickly realized I made two major mistakes. "2 tbsp tomato paste". Two. Tablespoons. I just added an entire can of tomato paste to my chili. 

Besides that unfortunate mishap I thought eh, it will still taste fine. Then I realized I forgot the beef broth. This turned out to be a major ingredient. So I leave the apartment in search of beef broth, after first peeking out of the kitchen to see if my roommates' doors were open and then casually sprinting past their rooms with the offensive pan of tomato paste chili to hide in my room so they wouldn't see. Once I was in the clear and out the door, I remembered it was 7:30 and all stores close at 6 p.m. While this was extremely inconvenient, I figured Friends convenience store would definitely have beef broth! After searching endlessly for beef broth and realizing they weren't as convenient as they made themselves sound, I come across a can of whole tomatoes. A-ha! This will definitely make it better. So I sprint back to my apartment holding a single can of whole tomatoes, just so excited to finally enjoy some chili on this blustery day! I retrieve the tomato paste concoction from my room, and add the can of tomatoes to the pot. At this point I realized I really needed something to make the chili more liquified (like I don't know, beef broth) and I faintly remembered a Pinterest chili recipe involving spaghetti sauce. Crossing my fingers, I added some spaghetti sauce thinking it would be my saving grace. Then I looked at my dinner and realized I would be eating a can of tomato paste with a few beef crumbles, some beans here and there, and a couple corn kernels. 

So I threw it all in the trash and ate a bowl of bran cereal. Next time I think I'll follow a recipe...or get a gyro.